The End of the Waiting Game

I find myself in life's waiting room a lot.  I'm flipping through magazines waiting for someone to come out and call my name.  They aren't calling me back into an examination room though.  No, they are giving me permission.  Permission to live my life.  I keep waiting for someone to tell me that it is okay to take care of myself, to take extra time to do yoga, to stretch, to walk, to eat right, and to get enough rest.  Our society is a work based society.  We get rewarded for hard work.  The more work a person does the more valuable they are.  If that is true then why do we worship the rich who no longer have to work?  We are a conflicted society.  We don't even know what we want or what we worship.  We wait and hope someone else will tell us.  

Tomorrow is launch day!  I have my E2 grocery list ready and my menu for the week prepared.  I remember how difficult the first two weeks were when I first went on this diet.  I know I will have my moments of weakness, so I will need to have healthy alternatives ready as well as  a list of healthy activities I can use to distract myself.  The important thing for me  to remember is that my goal isn't to feel full every second of every day but to be healthier overall.  My goal isn't instant gratification but to enjoy a greater quality of life overall.  I'm not going to get this program perfectly correct, but progress is my goal, not perfection.

I'm nervous, but instead of picking up yet another magazine and continuing to wait, I'm taking an action.  I'm not waiting for someone else to call my name.  I'm calling my name.  I'm giving myself permission to live my life.  I'm taking the time that I need to live the  life I love and love the life I live.  There will be ups and downs, but just like a heart monitor, ups and downs indicate life.

Just the Facts

Today I found myself wavering!  Oh no, this is not good.  I haven't even started and I'm already giving myself excuses for why I failed!  I think the most responsible and helpful response I can have to this would be to stop and ask myself "Why?".  Why would I already be looking for an exit strategy?  Sometimes I think that I lean on a nasty habit of leaning on excuses instead of stepping up and doing the work!  It is so much easier to make excuses, blame circumstances, point the finger at other people, or sudden situations than it is to do the work, make the changes and break the habits.  No one said taking care of myself would be easy.  It isn't easy but it is necessary!  If I want to be healthy then I have to take care of my body.  That's just a fact!  No more fantasy! 

Vegan Launch August 1, 2011

Well after spending a week sick in bed I have a new appreciation for my health. At 45 it is time to grow up and stop pretending that I can continue to abuse my body without suffering consequences. My body deserves good daily maintenance and I'm the only mechanic that is qualified to service it.

So, after finding Jonny's blog I feel confident in returning to the vegan life. I was on Dr. Esselstyn's diets for three months once before, with my parents, and felt great. I have owned Rip's book, The Engine 2 Diet, for over a year and toyed with the idea of starting his program more than once.

It is time to stop being a yo-yo and start being a responsible, caring adult who manages her life instead of letting her life manage her.